Monthly Archives: April 2015

about that life.

meninas

I need more people to dote on me as I pair pinned-on flowers with a flattering, peplum-enhanced corset dress. And I want to look bored as it happens. I’m talkin’ ho hum bored.

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stare

paul gaugin bored

I sometimes imagine these beautiful women in Tahiti talking in Gauguin’s works.

“Jesus, it’s Paul again. Quick! Look bored.”

“Just stare at that fruit. Stare like your damn life depends on it.”

I also imagine they could go on and on about being twinsies in their matching florals. No contest on the accessories though when girlfriend rocks that halo.

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deliver this, from eva

eva

Give up the ghost, Eva. No dress you design can land me Ryan Gosling. Not a single one. Though I’ll hand it to you: I’m really digging this Gemma Tie-Front Dress (let me know when you need my shipping address!).

tbh

renoir couple

“No, really. I like it when you read over my shoulder. Keep doing that.”

stretch it out

 

If I were to sell my ish for $700, I’d go ahead and make the customer think I did more than shove a canvas into a $35 Michael’s frame. The trick here is make them think I did that.  

you talkin to me?

 

Try and tell me it’s Monday tomorrow. Go ahead. Try. I won’t have ANY OF IT.

sally

 

 

I’m legitimately swooning at these eyebrows. Goes to show Sally Draper is just about the coolest girl around.

nice try, anthro

anthro mirror

Fun fact: If I’m going to spend $2,100 dollars on a mirror, I want to look perpetually like I have no weight to lose in its reflection, not a set of CDs that were covered in spray paint.

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saturday’s

boating-couple-aline-charigot-and-renoir-1881

Do you think she got this flower from this guy before or after he posted, “Saturday’s are for spending time with this chick” on his Instagram? Here’s hoping she can go in his phone and write “Saturday’s Saturdays” before dumping him immediately.

On a related note, what I wouldn’t GIVE for strikethrough on Insta!

little mermaid

little mermaid

There’s a whole lot of scholarship on the similarities between Ariel and Mary Magdalen — the red hair, the saucy feminine wiles, y’know, the usual — that Robert Langdon goes on and on about in The Da Vinci Code. What’s pretty great is Dan Brown messes up by identifying this as a Penitent Magdalen instead of one with a flame. Ay yai yai. Good thing I’m here for you, Dan!

I can’t speak for any of you, but I definitely gave a bigger heck about pulling a fork through my hair than identifying medieval symbolism when I watched The Little Mermaid.

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