arthipstory

John Lavery painted Spring in 1904. The real stunning information here is Lavery’s wife was not only a grade A cheater, BUT she was also on Irish banknotes as the gosh darn allegory of Lady Ireland.

GET OUT OF TOWN.

Trade the boy for my dog, and we’ve got outselves a pretty decent Saturday. 

An odalisque, by official definition, is a concubine in a Turkish harem.

In my definition, however, this particular odalisque is the everywoman who has to answer to how many years she’s been living in a specific city, or what her hobbies are outside of work.

Three. Drinking. Ta-da!

Not only is she celebrating her fifth wedding anniversary, but HRH The Duchess of Cambridge Kate Middleton is featured on the centenary issue of British Vogue. Two of the portraits from the shoot (taken by Josh Olins) are on display at the National Portrait Gallery.

Don’t get excited, state-siders…I’m learning the NPG hosting the exhibition is in London, not DC. Ugh.

I found this coloring book and, lo and behold!, I discovered a Gauguin that doesn’t make me double over with nausea. (BTW: Kudos to the editor who permitted the dozen or so naked women to appear in to a book clearly meant for children. If someone pitched a Gauguin book idea to me, I would’ve put it in the trash.)

Still Life with Three Puppies is, like I said, one of the only pictures that doesn’t use the seductive glares of naked chicks. Gauguin displays not being the sharpest knife in the drawer by painting a shallow perspective and zero depth, but whatever, these puppies be real cute. 

Speaking of cute puppies, mine chose to whine in front of the flight attendant while  his carrier. She made me pay for him.  THAT’S LIKE, 4 SOULCYCLES, OMAR!

Roger van der Weyden is attributed to painting the most geometric veil and the most sensational manicure of the 15th century.

Personally, I need less of this girl’s veil, and more that tiny, accented waist. Fine, fine, fine–I’ll take her cute pout + look of disinterest, too.