So, King Herod didn’t just boss the Wise Men around; turns out, the dude divorced his wife, only to marry his brother’s (which, her name was Herodiasno, actually).

Enter new stepdaughter, above. Salome parties and does, like, the most seductive dance to the point that Herod’s completely fawning for her antics. He asks what she wants more than anything, and girlfriend goes ahead and asks for John the Baptist’s head on a platter.

Seriously!? Girl. Puh-leeeze. You can have anything and you ask for someone’s decapitation!? I’d rather just have like, Frye boots or a well-catered dinner party or something.

Though, cheers, since you are easily the sassiest queen, sittin’ back with that platter and knife like you ’bout to do it yourself. Henri Regnault isn’t messin’ with your hair either.

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